Going to Seed...

When two people join together in holy matrimony, inevitably some parts of their personalities learn to ride back seat to others as they try and live in harmony with eachother. These parts are a piece of their individual egos. Those sunken personality traits tend to resurface for air when the couple is apart for extended periods of time. If one partner passes away, the change becomes more permanent.

I've seen it happen to grandparents in the later situation and to myself in the former, whenever hubby is away from home. I become like my old self; a spark of who I used to be when I was single. Sometimes I miss those parts of my personality and it's good to remember what it felt like to live the single life and to not have to care about how your actions affect the life of your spouse. It feels good to be able to be selfish every once in awhile.

On weekends when my husband and I are apart, It's like a slow awakening to a reunion with an old friend. I feel like I miss the old me; the one that felt more alive, was more vivacious and spontaneous. I also cared more about how I looked, the clothes I wore, and my overall appearance.

We don't all go to seed when we get married, but some of us do, and I kinda feel like I've let myself go, physically, emotionally, confidence-wise. Hear that? It's the world's smallest violin...playing a sad song for me. OK, it's over now. :)