Love and Respect, for the Ladies

He must love her, she must respect him, whether or not he or she is deserving of that love or respect. It figures that the hardest thing to show to your spouse is the very thing that God demands. Women easily and naturally love with abandon, and men good naturedly extend respect to their fellow man. How hard it is for a woman to respect her husband's God-given authority or for the man to love his wife as Christ loved the church!

It is the age-old struggle. Women consciously or subconsciously fighting their husbands for control in the marriage... Men struggling to step up to the plate and lead... Women not being satisfied with the attempts men make to help out around the house...nagging them to do it better, faster or differently altogether...

I think it is even harder to biblically submit to our husbands in this day and age when most women are working 40 plus hour weeks along side their husbands and then they have the house to come home to (and potential other responsibilities outside the home)! Men who have grown up in a home where their mom has done all the housework may decidely refrain from engaging in household chores leaving these duties to their working wives... and this is a source of friction in many a marriage.

What are ways that you have addressed this in your marriage? How do you communicate with your husband about who pays the bills? How do you divy up the chores? How have you set up your budget? Any advice?

Mom and Dad McKee

My parents are coming to visit us this weekend and I couldn't be more thrilled! Well, maybe I could...but I'm really excited!!!! Happiness is knowing that people love you and you love them back.

Getting Pregnant for the Right Reasons

Are there definite right and wrong reasons to get pregnant? If so what are they? As I have talked to my husband Jeff about having kids, we ponder the acceptable circumstances for bringing a child into this world. Number one we ask ourselves, "Why?" and number two "When?"

Some possible "Why" answers:

We should have a child because:

We're getting older and we want to see what our children will look like before we die.

We want people to be around to care for us when we die.

We want the experience of having a family.

We want to follow the Biblical directive to "be fruitful and multiply."

Some possible "When" answers:

When we have enough money

When we're old enough

When we're established in our careers and settled in our house

When we're ready to stop being the babies, and to start making babies...:)

But!

How much money is enough?

The biological clock is tickin' here people...

Will I ever be "established?"

When is the right time, and how do we know we are ready to be a parents?

What do you think?

Calvin and Hobbes

I am a pet person. I like pets. In fact I love them like a part of my family. It's like the godfather. You come after him, you come after the family. I'd go to the mattresses for my "boys."

This past Sunday evening, my husband and I had the saddening and emotionally exhausting experience of taking out beloved pet cat Calvin to the vet to be put down. Calvin was sick with chronic urinary tract blockages, causing him immense pain and the inability to urinate.

We were faced with the decision to either put him down or continue to let the vet bills mount with expensive surgeries that may or may not help cure his condition. In the end, we opted to save him pain and ourselves from losing our home by putting him to sleep.

That was the hardest decision I have ever had to make, that WE have ever had to make as a couple. Why did we have to make it? Why did God allow us to go through those painful moments? Why is his littermate and brother left without his companion? Why did Calvin have to be sick at all? What if I had done things differently? Did we do the "right" thing?

In the world of "Whys?" we can choose to berate ourselves with questions like these, to second guess and torment oursleves or we can choose to believe that through prayer, God lead us to the right decision and that He is sovreign. He knew that before Calvin and Hobbes were placed into our arms as kittens that this day, Calvey-Poo-Pants would leave us on Sunday evening, less than two years from the time he became our kitty. He knew that his brother Hobbes would be left without a companion and friend to play with while Jeff and I are at work. He knew the pain we would feel, but he also knew the joy we had until the day we lost him.

I choose to believe that my Calvin AND my Hobbes are blessings from the Lord. That while they are here with us, they bring us joy and in the unexpected end, some sorrow, but they are to be treasured.

Depending on your theological perspective, you may or may not believe that pets go to heaven. I like to believe that they do, but I can't tell that it explicitly says that anywhere in God's Word. I had the privilege of being blessed by two little cats and of raising them from kitten-hood to cat-hood. I also had the privilege of being there to hold my little guy when the dear vet who had worked to long to help Calvin, put him to sleep forever.

Jeff and I were there together to hold him and comfort him and to pray that God would take him home to Himself.

My Calvin. We will miss him so.